Back in Hospital, Again

So our little guy just can't seem to catch a break and is back in the hospital. It started early this morning with him not finishing all of his bottles. Then I started noticing his breathing was a little different, not particularly faster than usual but it sounded funny. I mentioned these things to his home care nurse during today's visit and she was concerned but didn't think that these things within themselves were too concerning. And since Justin had a doctor's appointment tomorrow she told me to monitor him and if things got worse to call his pediatrician. I was running errands so I wasn't home for his noon feeding but my mom said he didn't finish that bottle either. And then she mentioned that he wasn't fussy or been crying much so I thought that was a little strange. And when I changed his diaper he just layed there and didn't make a fuss which is not him at all. I tried feeding him at 3 and he was really disinterested. So I called the pediatrician's office but was told that his doctor was done for the day and to go to the after hours clinic which started taking walk ins at 5. Not thinking that there was anything major going on my mom and I waited and took him there, only to be told that they weren't touching him because we really needed to go to the ER because they felt it was more serious.

Fortunately we were seen immediately but nothing prepared me for the whirlwind to come. Justin was rushed back to a trauma room and by the time I got in there they had cut off his clothes and were attempting to put in an IV. Then I hear them say that they're going to intubate him and I loose it because that means he's going back on a ventilator and would obviously be re-admitted. I was so relieved when the ER doctors called the NICU and they came down to assist. The NICU nurse practitioner's were asking me what happened but I don't really know and all I could say was he just wasn't taking his bottles and he was lethargic. But in the back of my mind I'm doubting my motherly instinct and getting mad at myself because I should have called sooner. They kept telling me that there's nothing different I could have done and that unfortunately this is something that's going to happen because of his prematurity. But somehow that doesn't make me feel any better.

We're still not really sure what's going on. When they got him hooked up to the oxygen saturation machine in the ER he was satting at 60 which is really low (a good range is 85-92). And when they got his clothes off they noticed that his chest was significantly retracted which indicates distressed breathing. The x-ray shows that his heart looks a little large which could indicate excess fluid and also that he's working really hard to breathe. He was readmitted to the NICU and they're running a series of blood and urine cultures and takings tons of x-rays to see what's going on.